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Top 5 Beard Myths

Written By Johnny Slicks 13 Feb 2019
Top 5 Beard Myths

Top 5 Myths About Beards

Johnny Slicks
Renowned Scientist and Self Proclaimed Genius

There has always been myths and rumors regarding beards and their wearers. I'm here to say...NO!

Myth # 1. "You cant grow a beard if you cant grow a beard!"

I hear this one quite often and its GOT TO STOP! I joke but, in reality, we live in a time where many things are "proven to be true" by randos on the internet without any actual studies. Now there are plenty of factors that go into hair growth but the top ones are Genetics, Patience, and Grooming Products. Your genes obviously have a large factor in what you look like and how you grow. But, Patience and Grooming Products are also huge! With the right diet, the right product, and a little bit of patience, you can see substantial growth. Many of you are doubtful of this and here is what i say to you...look at my title up there! Renowned Scientist and Self Proclaimed Genius! So shut up and move on to Myth #2!

Myth # 2. "Beards are dirty."

Let me hit you with some knowledge! Having a beard or being clean shaven has the same amount of "dirtiness". It depends on the wearer. This is a perfect example of a viral rumor. A news station in New Mexico did a "study" where they swabbed "a handful" of bearded men's beards and found they "contained a lot of normal bacteria, but some were comparable to toilets." Now, this study is not only ridiculous but completely unreliable. They did not provide a number of testers, they only tested a few beards and thats it. A more trusting study was performed in 2016 and showed us results by testing bearded gents and clean shaven gents. 408 men were swabbed and the results were quite the opposite of the previous "study". This current study shows us that bacteria will stick and spread on skin in general and even goes to find that there were certain species of bacteria only found on clean shaven dudes. So, to say "beards are dirty" is like saying water is wet. Everyone is dirty! So stay inside, lock the doors, and bathe in hand sanitizer, because "beards are dirty!"

Myth # 3. "Shaving makes hair grow thicker and faster."

Where in the actual F@#k did this come from?! Seriously guys, I've been researching for hours and cant find an actual source. If you know where it came from, please, tell me in the comments because i cant find it! Anyways, even though i have no idea where this started or why, i can still tell you it is still a believed thing. Think about this logically, if shaving...made hair grow faster and thicker...why doesn't my wife have grizzly bear legs?! I want to know! But in reality, it really doesn't do anything for your hair density or growth rate by shaving. This is such a believed myth that even i believed it until i was 20. Shaving will only delay growth, if you are looking to grow your beard to the best of it's ability, eat right, exercise, use beard oil, take biotin, and drink water! Don't shave with the mindset that every stroke makes your future beard game stronger. Which takes me to Myth # 4. 

Myth # 4. "Beards peak at the age of 20. If i don't have a beard now, i never will."

This is just biologically incorrect. Now some 20 year olds can grow a badass looking beard but, look at the majority of men. Beards peak from mid 30's to early 40's. And if you look around, you'll see that is true. Now, being young, i understand that we (young folk) believe that here and now is going to be how things are forever. Example, "Im never going to find a girlfriend." But really you've only been single for 3 months and its because you ran out of Johnny Slicks and she dumped your ass for your co-worker Dave who uses Rugged Pomade daily...where was I? Oh yeah, whats happening here and now will not, for the most part, last forever! You will have hair growth or maybe even hair loss (preventable with Johnny Slicks).

Myth # 5. "My Beard Doesn't Look Good"

Well this isn't technically a myth but it made it to the list because i hear it more often than i would like to (which is never). Why do you think your beard doesn't look good? Is it because someone told you that? Are you comparing your beard to someone else's? Either way, your'e WRONG! A beard is a beard is a beard and beards are beautiful. Just because yours doesn't look like someone you saw on Instagram or Facebook doesn't mean you should shave or be ashamed of your beard. If someone told you it looks bad, ask yourself, why are they saying that? Are they jealous of your confidence to change your look? If they are a woman just say "why are you out of the kitchen?!" I kid i kid...respect women. Anyways, there are going to be haters no matter what you do, so why not do what makes you happy? Here at Johnny Slicks, we are all about making sure you are comfortable and happy with the way you look and feel. That is why we created the single most efficient formula for healthy growth. It is actually proven that Johnny Slicks products will get you laid. Here are some reviews from actual customers. These actually happened...i couldn't make these up if i tried.

"Turns my lady into a sex crazed animal" -James

"I decided to try Johnny Slicks beard oil and pomade set. First thing i did when I received it was take it out of the book and do a smell test. It passed, and I was looking forward to trying it the next day. I put it on before going to work and promptly gave my wife and newborn son a kiss as I headed out the door. My wife commented on its smell saying it was, "surprisingly pleasant." When I returned home that night my wife said she could smell it on my sons head, and that it was making her irrationally horny. Let's just say that evening, after the children went to bed, was surprisingly pleasant for me. Thus, I continue to use it and tell my friends about it. While it isn't specifically sold as a sexual arousal product, it gets the job done non the less. I guess it is worth mentioning that my dry flaky skin under my beard has cleared up, and I don't have all of that dead skin on my shirts anymore. My beard and skin feel very moisturized." -Chris

Thanks for reading guys. I hope some of this information was useful to you. If not, i hope you still enjoyed it. Let me know what you think of this article and what other topics you would like me to cover in the comment section.

Stay Slick!

Top Products

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Original Scented Organic Beard Oil

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Antonymous - April 22 2019

Hi I definitely agree that shaved hair isn’t actually gonna grow much thicker in any case and not at all if shaving once or a few times. Otherwise bald or balding people who shave their head would solve their problem. although, I you don’t mind I’m curious on how does hair know when to stop growing? If you trim the hair under your arm, how does the root of the hair know that the end has been cut and that it is time to grow again? Thanks so much.

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